A recent conversation with my trainer made me really laugh because yet another star was checking into a hospital for “exhaustion.” It made me want to translate L.A. speak for all of you non-Angelenos because it really is priceless.
What the tabloids say: “…checking in [to the psych ward] for exhaustion. What it means: Someone’s heading into rehab.
What the stars say: “I’m naturally thin.” What it means: I eat like a truck driver and then barf it all up. a.k.a. bulimia. You can’t claim you’re naturally thin when last year you were forty pounds heavier than your “naturally thin” frame.
What the tabloids will report: “She was seen coming out of Beverly Hills doctor’s (fill in the blank there are so many) after having reportedly undergone treatment for a ‘deviated septum’.” What it means: The yo yo had a nose job.
Cameron Diaz, now she probably did have surgery for a deviated septum or a surfing accident or whatever because there have been photos of her smacked by her surfboard. Jennifer Aniston, not so much. Anybody get a skull crusher from too much time at the yoga studio? Not.
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