And Then, the Rabbit Died

Of course it did.

I woke up this morning to “oon creesees” (crisis.) You mean there is a crisis that I have yet to experience this week??? Don’t even answer that. In some strange bunny boiler-twist-of-fate-situation, I am informed that the rescued rabbits that we brought home from their day at the guillotine are only half with us. Evidently, one of them tried to get out of the cage (yes, brand new, certified bunny safe cage) and got stuck and broke a leg or a something and has passed. Do I need to tell you that my three year old who has ignored the rabbits for the last three days marches up to the cage this morning and says “Way-r ma wabbit?”

People, I have not even been home 24 hours. I couldn’t even deal. I just said the rabbit has gone to heaven and that’s that. The nanny looked at me like Ishould be committed. This is the new nanny (first day of course) who has replaced the soap stealer. To indoctrinate her properly, my children decided to throw their eggs (free range), step on them, come down with colds (maybe an allergy to their mother?), and question the location of heaven for deceased, rescued house pets.

I am leaving at the crack of dawn tomorrow for Tampa with more suitcases for these tv shows than you can shake a stick at and all I keep wondering is whether it would be appropriate to start drinking now. BTW, if that soap stealer thinks she cursed me by boiling my bunny, I can assure you that I can out voodoo her any day of the week.

Oh, and did I mention I was at Pizzeria Mozza last night and had about 16 courses, including 5 kinds of pizza. I pretty much look like Orca has escaped from Sea World. To cap it off, I out-ate the 6?2″ gentleman sitting next to me at the party. Pure class I am today.