So last night I go to dinner in my sweet, idyllic town of Pasadena, CA. These days I barely socialize at all, because, a) I don’t want to and b) my job is social enough for 400 people and c) drumroll please…I am in the middle of completing lots of pink informational products. OK, you know all of that.
Fast forward, I run home to get to the season finale of The Real Housewives of Orange County and the premiere of The Real Housewives of New York City. Impossibly fabulous. As I am sitting there thinking Jill (NYC) has lost weight, she looks good! Gretchen (O.C.) really is so amazingly beautiful, I am sorry that her 70 year old husband to be has now passed, maybe Vicki is just jealous and that’s why she didn’t go and see her new Harley? etc. So my claws are out and I’m being snarky, ready to blog, trying to think how in heavens name I’m going to beat the alpaca blog of yesterday when it hits me. I LIVE IN MY OWN REAL F–CKIN’ HOUSEWIVES OF PASADENA. Why?
Read on. So, rewind, I’m at dinner. There’s been this ongoing thing about a book club I no longer belong to. (Insert snort, yes, I do read.) Anyway, one of the women in charge of it kept emailing us all about dates and I kept politely responding that with my work/travel schedule, I couldn’t commit to a date and had to bow out of the book club. She kept sending the emails, I kept politely responding. So basically I’m just thinking that I’m on the general group book club list and she isn’t sure how to get me off. Whatever. Next. Next indeed.
So, at dinner last night, ONE glass of wne in, I ask the ladies how the book club is going. (The one who is a little email challenged wasn’t there.) Long story short, they ended up canceling it at the last second because only a few people were going to show, etc. Shocker (scheduling this book club evidently is like putting together the G-8 summit with these ladies’ schedules.) The sister of the woman at the table (also a former book club member) proceeds to mention that yes, that book club has unfortunately disbanded but there is a NEW book club. I wasn’t invited, but then I didn’t really expect to be since, yes, I had tried three times to get out of the first one. And THEN ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE.
The sister says, yes, but there are only going to be a few chosen people in the NEW book club. (Of course I don’t care [suuuuuurrrrrrreeeee], but I ask anyway.) The new book club will be composed of about four women (in and of themselves they are all perfect.) Great idea I think, it’s a good group. The sister asks her, well, sister, to tell us who’s going to be in it. She does but she throws something else in it. The book club will ONLY BE COMPRISED OF WOMEN WHO ARE NOT DIVORCED. My head spun so fast on its axis that I thought my world would come crashing down. Excuse me? What do you mean it will only be comprised of women who are not divorced? Well, evidently the new leader doesn’t think divorced women are ok, therefore my friend’s sister (who is telling us all of this) is not allowed and neither am I. (For the record, my first marriage was ANNULED by the same freakin’ priest this woman adores – go figure and the fact that I have been married now forever I guess doesn’t matter?) Anyway, that’s not enough I guess. My friend’s sister, who is going through a challenging (to put it mildly) custody battle which is scheduled to get resolved on Thursday, BURSTS INTO TEARS AT THE TABLE. I thought I was going to throw up I was so upset for her. Quite frankly, I could give two flying figs if I’m divorced, I’m best friends with my ex-husband, things happen, life goes on, next. Not next in Pasadena (maybe “Not Next In Pasadena” should’ve been my title of this blog!) So my broken hearted friend leaves the table, the sister goes after her (it’s raining in Pasadena, big issues, coats have to go on, etc.) to try and comfort her. Long story short, she comes back to the table, I tell her to try and forget about these losers who don’t know their buttons from their behinds and just be done. She is so sad and so upset she wants to know why she even moved here. Oh no, my heart breaks again.
And then, I rush home to watch The Real Housewives of Orange County and NYC? Why? These people have nothing on The Real Housewives of Pasadena. I think I need to do a little extra Korean meditation today and pray to Buddha that he saves me from the fires of hell. Maybe I’ll start listening to my Napolean Hill stuff again. Wasn’t he the guy – “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, I get better every day?” Maybe I’ll make up some stickers for my forehead, written backwards so I can see them when I look in the mirror.
Send help. I’m being absorbed into an exhaust pipe of gossip. Now I know why I don’t leave my house. Toodles! The pink informational product process is looking better by the second.
Oh my gosh! I am a HUGE fan of The Real Housewives of OC and NYC!!! I’m hooked! But I’m not so sure about The Real Housewives of Atlanta…we’ll see.
I, too, have ‘real housewives’! I’m convinced the world would LOVE to see all the bling and excess that the REAL HOUSEWIVES of Midland, Texas would have! They all own oil, private jets and you know….stuff! Many are friends, and some USE to be…but livin’ with it day after day can get tiresome…:)
Anyway – LOVED the “Job Costing” seminar tonight…My 2nd conference, and I’m really getting great info (FINALLY some answers!!!)from someone who knows!
I’m 2 years into the event/party planning bizness, and I still think I’m not charging enough! Even though I know what I’m doing creatively, I still feel like I’m flying by the seat of my pants sometimes! I am putting your talking points to use tomorrow, and I’ll let ya know! 🙂
Thanks girl!
Cindi
Marley! The drAmaaaaaahhh! As a divorced woman and one who LEFT the husband, I find this all very offensive and strangely controlling! They must have a very small group of women in that book club if they dis all the divorcee’s~ Brother.. and WHO made that decisions and even more troubling, HOW did that even enter someone’s mind to make a stupid book club into a happily married once book club? It just doesn’t make any sense and it’s disgusting.. its sounds a bit like they’re taking cues from the new administration!! Sigh..
I came in the middle of Housewives of OC.. and saw the whole jealous vicki, insanely happy gretchen.. so, Jeff Died? oy.. what will happen to her now.. wonder what he left her.$$$ did you think that their relationship is/was real? or just convenience.. or both.. blah..
Well, I had my own drama here last nite. My almost 15 yr old son joined me on my bed last nite as I was watching Grey’s Anatomy..he comes in nightly to hug me good nite.. I was fully clothed and wrapped in blanket after blanket and when he sat there with me he got cold and shared the top blanket with me. My husband walked in…his step dad. All hell broke loose.. “THAT is not all right with me! AT ALL!” and he storms out of the room.. down the stairs.. to stew.. My son goes to bed. probably shaking. Then, husband comes back up the stairs.. and shows me my son’s NEW cell phone of about 3 weeks. It’s his first. There was the NASTIEST language that was like Penthouse graphic on a text he had recv’d from his friend at school. Disgusted, husband races back downstairs to cool off. I scream for my son to come back in the room. I tell him READ this! He did. His shoulders shrunk. and he said, “I swear mom, this has never happened before! I didn’t know he was going to text this?” ( I believe him because he leaves his phone out at nite downstairs where anyone can see a text coming in (my husband was plugging his phone in next to his when the text came up and he saw the word F… and then thought.. well, probably some silly teen aged conversation..then looked harder and there was things involving naked this and rubbing this..) and oh my LORD have MERCY ON MY SOUL!! SO, since I didn’t have my reading glasses with me, I told my boy to text back to this kid who sent him this. “Tyler, this is Dean’s Mom and I have read what you sent. I will be calling your mother to let her know what has happened.” Oh boy..i was seeing Dean was thinking things like I’m gonna catch hell at school.. all that stuff.. We had told him that that’s not why he gets a cell phone.. but what’s a kid to do if some jerk passes around porn on text?? Geesh! So I stomp downstairs and pick up the phone and call my husband’s former wife who’s, I think, really a man.. or a neanderthal, and I ask for this kid’s mom’s phone number.. in her husky man-voice she says, “Idn’t it in da book?” I replied with shaking voice (obviously very upset) “Her kid sent a text to my son that’s vulgar and disgraceful and I need to talk to her about it and I don’t feel like fumbling through a phone book!” Wull ( low man-voice) I only have her cell phone and dun’t feel comfortable givin’ it out.” Shocked and disgusted cuz she is the most selfish revolting “woman” on the face of this earth, I gave a firm “FINE!” and hung up. Apparently, she called the text mom’s kid cuz when I DID find the number in the book, I called it.. nobody answered.. then i decided to just reply on the cell phone.. the mom answered.. she was nervous, upset, said she was ALREADY looking at the phone now.. well, that meant that that man bitch had already called to her to warn her of what was going on. So we talked like mothers do.. she said that she was glad I called because if the shoe was on the other foot, she’d do the same. (I pray this shoe /foot thing would never be!)She had already taken his phone from him. Today, I didn’t let Dean take his.. just because..Since then,my husband and I talked about it and decided he’s pretty honest…
Then this morning over the phone I had it out w/my husband about my own son being on the bed watching tv with me. I let him know that our upbringings were different and there were some times where I would sit on the side of my dad’s bed and give him a back scratch or a back rub.. and that’s just what families do.. but ..he says he understands now..but who knows.. just one more rung off the ladder of love.
SO. take caution with cell phones~ and if your husband is freaky about functional family togetherness.. then don’t let your teen kid sit with you.. anywhere! arghhh!
I hope your day is better,. I came online to see my new order and this is what I was sidetracked to do.. sorry.. and I hope your friend is feeling better today. there ought to be divorced only book clubs..like food clubs that way the book worms will be jealous that the divorcee’s are baking their cake and eating it, too!
adios
susie
Oooo, REAL DRAMA everywhere! Yikes, Susie Q, sounds like you’re gettin’ it from both sides of the boy fence!
I’m living with my own reality series “Life with a Teenage Boy” and it sure doesn’t sound like the one you’re in! My 16-yr-old would prefer I not speak to him, much less hang out watchin’ TV! We had a real life, knock-down, drag-out event 2 nights ago. It was HIS HORMONES -vs- MY HORMONES! It is almost daily right now, and I hope I can survive it! Who’s winnin’? Well, let’s just say I’ve got his truck keys :)!
Cheers to Moms-of-Teens everywhere!!