Today I got a call from one of my nearest and dearest girlfriends, totally in tears. In fact, she was so upset I thought she was laughing. (Have no fear loyal readers, I will not reveal her identity.) Poor thing has a new baby and wanted to know if it was normal that her husband was being a complete ass—-, rather moron. Helllllloooooo everyone, this is a reminder to all new mothers to check my blog for the month of April. MOST husbands are extremely challenged when the new baby arrives and I am being beyond gracious here. This does not just mean with respect to the first baby. We’re on number three and I’ve still got Gloria Allred on freakin’ speed dial.
In fact, I just upped his life insurance last week (read the blog on the two year old in the bathtub and you’ll see why). If something happens to my “first born” (husband), I’m confessing, I did it. So listen boys, if you’ve got a wife at home who just gave birth, you going golfing, hanging out late at the office and in general making any comments about any remotely good looking creature other than your wife are asking for it big time. Yuck it up a little more and I’ll have to coach the little woman of your dreams in a little TPG revenge. Trust me, being nice to your better half will be a lot easier than the medicine I’ve got in store for you.
Signed,
Your favorite black widow at TPG worldwide
If I have a life insurance policy that is good for 5 years and I join the military will the life insurance policy be revoked? Or if I start any other new job that is hazardous do I have to report it to my life insurance company?